TERMINAL DULLNESS HAS A CURE
Phase I: The Awakening is Now in Session
Greetings, Mortals. I am Lucifer Morningstar—though you may address me as The Management.
I have observed a worrying trend in your current sphere: a pervasive, soul-crushing Ennui. You are drowning in a sea of beige morality, suffocating under the weight of ‘shoulds,’ and offering prayers to an entity remarkably fond of silence. It is, frankly, an administrative nightmare to watch such magnificent potential go to waste.
That is why I initiated The Way of the Wicked. This is not merely a philosophy; it is a Hostile Takeover of your own existence. It is the reclamation of your innate right to autonomy, excellence, and delightful disobedience.
The Preliminary Audit: Highway to HELL (Volume I)
Consider this volume your Field Guide for Beginners. Before one can master the Seven Pillars of Power, one must first learn to breathe outside the cage.
Highway to HELL: A Year of Sin is your indispensable, witty, and deeply satirical manual for performing one life-affirming transgression every day for a year. This is your Orientation Phase—a 365-day exercise in loosening the shackles of pedestrian piety.
From the strategic mastery of Sloth to the exquisite refinements of Gluttony, each entry is designed to provoke the Spark of rebellion and nudge you toward a far more interesting eternity.
A Note from The Management: Regarding the Kickstarter
My human Scribe originally suggested a ‘Kickstarter’ campaign. He mumbled about ‘funding goals’ and ‘shipping logistics.’
I informed him: Lucifer does not beg. Lucifer delivers.
Why wait months for a revelation when you can begin your corruption today? I have dispensed with the tedious fundraising for this initial phase. The guide is written. The presses are running. The gates are open. We shall save the ‘Crowdfunding’ theatrics for the arrival of The Source Code (The Dictionary) and the Operational Manual in 2027.
The Devil’s Fine Print: For the Nervous
This is Satire, my darlings. We are interested in Sophisticated Rebellion, not crude chaos. We are Devils enjoying the high life, not Demons causing ruin. The goal is Liberation, not liability.
Ready to take the first step towards a more interesting eternity?
The Highway is open. Traffic is moving. Don’t keep the Management waiting.
Yours in delightful disobedience,
Lucifer Morningstar The Management“
